The author and her mother, Analise Brown, circa 2000

My mom died on July 18, 2021.

I’ve been in a weird in-between state, half awake and half-sleep.

I wanted to post on social media a funny experience I had with my sons but I could not bring myself to share it.

I cannot share the few glimpses of light that brighten my days because the world has returned to normal and I don’t want to invite the idea that I have also returned to normal when I’m far from it. I am terrified for people to…